that thing?

i'm just going to jump right into the serious and then make you feel good with some pictures of a baby.

i had a rough weekend in my mind. i was very aware of a few different sins in my life. problems i had created for myself because of them. i just couldn't escape the guilt. fear. anxiety. last night before bed i read the Bible. i opened to Psalms, and read every verse i've ever underlined in Psalms. (that is #1 on a list of reasons why i don't want a new Bible. mine is falling apart, sure, but a new Bible wouldn't have 13 years of underlined verses and notes.)

it's hard to read some of the lovelier verses in the Bible when i'm dealing with sin, because i think "sure. God is a refuge. BUT this is my SIN we're talking about. i'm not being attacked, i'm not a victim. i created this problem." but the Psalms go there.

from Psalm 25...

Remember, O LORD, your great mercy and love,
for they are from of old.
Remember not the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways;
according to your love remember me,
for you are good, O LORD.
Good and upright is the LORD;
therefore he instructs sinners in his ways.

My eyes are ever on the LORD,
for only he will release my feet from the snare.
Turn to me and be gracious to me,
for I am lonely and afflicted.
The troubles of my heart have multiplied;
free me from my anguish.
Look upon my affliction and my distress
and take away all my sins.

the Word really does wash a person.

then today at work our CD player was broken, so at nap time i had to turn it on a radio station. and the quietest one was a country station. and now i just feel dirty all over again. i cannot stand country music. i'm sorry. i'm not saying those people aren't talented musicians. they absolutely are. they sing beautifully, and play beautifully.

but ugh. say hello to the worst song lyric i've ever heard in my life:

"I remember sayin' I don't care either way
Just as long as he or she is healthy I'm okay
Then the doctor pointed to the corner of the screen
And said, 'You see that thing right there, well you know what that means.'"

then there was the song about the man who held the hand of his wife of fifty years while her heart of gold stopped pumping. why do people find depressing music entertaining? i don't get it. i also don't like the movie "steel magnolias." life is hard enough without spending my free time feeling sad about something that's not real. no thanks.

so how about some baby pictures!!

i thought it would be super fun if i put up pictures of kailey AND my new niece makenna. not as a comparison, no i will not be comparing them. but watch.

the first moment i met kailey (december 2007, 2 weeks old)...




the first moment i met makenna (august 2010, 3 months old)



the first time i held kailey (december 2007)...



the first time i held makenna (august 2010)...



feeding kailey a bottle (may 2008, almost 6 months old)



feeding makenna a bottle (august 2010)




kailey's little feet (december 2007)



makenna's little feet (august 2010)




i love my nieces!!